I have tried for almost a year now to figure out how to be patient and appropriate.  Two things I’ve been told I “need to work on” by people I look up to.  Now, I have also been fighting off anxiety attacks and some major depression as of the past about ninety days and I haven’t really been able to figure out why.  Oddly enough, it took a feminist missionary (I think the irony was what jarred me back into reality) to make me stop and think, “Yep, this just isn’t going to work”.

Before I go into this rantisque story here though I would like to make a statement.  I, personally, think I am a very kind person for a human who doesn’t really like humans in general.  It’s nothing personal to anyone.  Trust me.  I am just not a fan of our genes.  Not our fault.

Now onto the part that is our fault…

We are told on almost a daily basis to be “appropriate” and the right times and to be “patient” with those who need it.  So, before we go on let me give you a side note to think about…who the hell do you know who you can actually say that they are “appropriate”.  Don’t bullshit.  The answer is nobody.

Appropriate - Suitable or proper in the circumstances.

You might get lucky with this whole being appropriate thing though.  You may have figured out the right cocktail of pills to take before these circumstances happen to stay “appropriate”…another bad habit us everyday humans have decided is…appropriate?  Ah yes, I won’t dwell on that this time around but you are more than welcome to.

Asking people to be appropriate is just silly to me.  There are far too many opinions in this world of what is and isn’t “appropriate” that I think we are just asking for it when we say the word.  To some people, protesting funerals, kidnapping children from third world countries, and shooting each other for some reason or another is “appropriate”.  Of course when you say it in plain english like that it sounds “crazy”.

Crazy - Mentally deranged, especially as manifested in a wild or aggressive way.

So, in my humble opinion I say we skip trying to make everyone be “appropriate” because it make you go “crazy”.  Trust me, I am a perfect example.  I definitely felt mentally deranged after trying to be appropriate for so long.  It just felt, wrong.

Now, something that makes better sense to me is asking that humans be more “considerate”.  The thought that we can just ask everyone to drop any idea that the other thinks is “inappropriate” is…HEY YOU GUESSED IT…totally and completely CRAZY!!!  

Considerate - Careful not to cause inconvenience or hurt to others.

Being considerate takes it back to the basics a little bit more.  There are words like ‘careful’, ‘inconvenience’, and ‘hurt’.  These are all words we know very well.

Now, coming from someone who is very bad at being appropriate, I am in turn very good at being considerate.  The simple part of being considerate that many humans don’t think about is that sometimes being considerate means nothing else other than “shut the fuck up”, or another one of my favorites, “walk away”.

Can you imagine what the world would be like if all humans from all backgrounds found the strength to be considerate?  I bring up the word “strength” because it takes a lot.  Also, much practice so don’t think it would be instant…that’s also crazy.

There will still be people who think a man can marry five women but two women can’t be married.  People who think racism is a good idea.  There will still be people who think you are too young, or too old for that matter, to know anything.  Humans will be the gross creatures we are and we can’t fix that by being “appropriate”.  What we can try though is to have such a mind set that we don’t hurt each other.

I know to some, this may sound like a “just stick your head in the sand and ignore everything” maneuver.  I cannot tell you how to take things so think what you will.  What I do mean by this passage is…humans will be humans.  We only have the history of other animals to predict what will happen to us.  The least we can do for each other is…let it be.  Let nature take her course or god do his thing or whatever everyone believes.

At the end of the day, all you can do is try to make the lives around you better as well as your own.  Do not hurt.  That gets everyone nowhere really quick.

On a closing note, if you do feel as though you (or a friend) are on the edge of hurting…please say something to someone.  The odds are that your insides are outta whack or you’ve needed to change things up for a while…and it is completely okay.  The events that have happened in the past few weeks in the US as well as other countries on this planet have been damaging for many…including those the actions were done in the name of.

I shall leave your brains alone for now and yes I know, this was a bit more on a serious note than usual for me but…every now and again you must surprise.

P.S. Next up is the difference between being “patient” and “tolerant”.